Fathers Resources International

Fathers Resources International

How We Can Help You
Our Holistic Approach to
the Problems that Separated
Fathers Routinely Face
We can help you, no matter where you live in western civilization. We don't re-invent, we teach fathers the skills and attributes of divorced dads who have succeeded.

Applying our strategies, tactics, systems and approach to thinking will lead you in the correct direction. Know and believe that it is possible to win both inside and outside of Family Court, whether you are in negotiations, mediation or heading into Family Court proceedings.

There are three levels of difficulties fathers
face during separation / divorce.
And it all begins with one simple principle...
Your Legal Problems do not create
Family Problems

Your Family Problems create Legal Problems...


Family Problems can ultimately lead to a very messy separation and divorce. When this happens most fathers do not have the right level of experience, knowledge, peer mentoring / support, and management skills and your situation can go awry very quickly. Our services are a holistic approach, based on the success we have built with the fathers we have assisted for over 15 years.

How to unravel your problems...


We bring a lifetime of experience in unraveling these problems. Like an onion, your problems consist of three layers:  
1.
The Seed    2. The Onion itself   3. The Onion skin

FIRST LAYER OF YOUR PROBLEM
The Family Problems


The first layer, or "The Seed" are your family problems, the dynamics involved and your personal history of how you find yourself in this situation. Everything you learned in your own family as a child, whatever rebellion set in as a teenager, and whatever choices you made as an adult led you  to this moment. If you ignore this fact, you will spend a lot of money fighting in Family Court needlessly, and most likely keep on repeating the same pattern of failed relationships with your next partner/wife.

SECOND LAYER OF YOUR PROBLEM
The Knowledge / Experience Gap


The second layer is the "Knowledge/Experience Gap". You don't have the skills to successfully manage the situation. If you did there would not be a problem in the first place. You would have made better choices, had a longer courtship, used better language to communicate and tried better ways to negotiate. Now your problem has escalated to the point where you have no other option but to educate yourself about Family Law, Family Court, how to find a GREAT lawyer with the right experience and track record helping fathers succeed during separation and divorce.

THIRD LAYER OF YOUR PROBLEM
Your Legal Problems

The third layer are your legal problems... for this layer you will need a really GREAT lawyer with experience and a track record helping fathers succeed during separation and divorce. Most fathers do not realize they need an experienced family law specialist nor how to find one.

HOW THIS MODEL WORKS

Your Family problems cause your "Knowledge/Experience Gap" to widen. Without the right tools to properly manage your situation, you begin having legal problems. The longer you ignore the Family problems, the more education you will need, and as a consequence your legal problems begin to mount and escalate in the interim while you get up to speed.

This is important... Women initiate separation and divorce 75% of the time, and men are usually playing catch up, hoping against hope that it will go away or solve itself and the marriage will survive. We call this the "Hope against Hope Syndrome".  Men will often bury their heads in the sand hoping they can either ride out the storm, or that a miracle will save them.

Men can also suffer from "White Knight Syndrome".  It's an old trait of days gone by, where they want to rescue their damsel in distress, when they do not recognize that she has become the devil in disguise, willing to do whatever it takes to win.

"White Knight Syndrome" men are in denial and
have no clear picture of the reality...
And sadly, they often don't wake up until they have lost it all...


THE SOLUTIONS WE OFFER

Your situation does not have to be this way - there are alternative solutions that have worked for the many fathers with whom we have worked. All it takes is the strength of character to educate yourself and implement the separation / divorce management skills that we have been teaching fathers for over 15 years.

Separation / divorce management counseling and coaching will help you optimize your chances of success. Think of it like this: If you were a "star athlete", you would have a manager and a coach. The manager takes care of optimizing the business of being a "star athlete", and the coach takes care of optimizing your performance as a "star athlete".

In our approach, the lawyer is your "agent" taking care of the legal business, while we work with you as a "coach" to help you optimize your approach an situation outside of the Family Court. Our coaching program strategies and tactics teach you everything you need to know and do to become a successful father after separation/divorce.

THE TRUTH ABOUT FAMILY COURT

Family Court and the Legal System will not micromanage the solutions to your Family Problems - that is your job. When all is said and done, the Family Court, the Judge, the Lawyers, the Assessors, the Children's Lawyer and anyone else involved professionally will eventually go away, and leave you with what the Legal System has decided. In the final analysis, you, your children and your ex-wife will still have many, many challenges ahead.

WHAT IS AT STAKE FOR YOUR CHILDREN?

Children suffer the greatest loss. That's the reality that you face - and it is not one that is often explained by the legal community to moms and dads alike. Children may view their parents as being hypocritical. Most children cannot properly articulate their problems and feelings and  begin acting out: school grades drop, they hang with the wrong crowd, their behavior begins to escalate into lying, cheating and stealing. Many children are misunderstood and will act out their pain in extreme ways through juvenile delinquency, truancy, promiscuity, alcohol/drug abuse and addiction.

It all leads to a dysfunctional future. They are unable to complete their education in the more extreme cases; unable to form successful relationships with the opposite sex and in later life they are at greater risk of the same family breakdown.

YOUR ROLE AS YOUR CHILD'S ADVOCATE

Your role as dad is to advocate for your child's right to peace within their family. Ultimately this is in their best interests. Often we've found that it's not having the right tools that prevents fathers from reaching a successful relationship with their children.

We have developed time-tested systems, and have gathered the very best counseling, coaching, legal guidance tips and other family law help for fathers. It is all based on a positive,  child focused male perspective. Our services are unique. We educate you on how to effectively reach your reasonable goals by learning how to wage peace. Remember that when you Wage Peace = you are creating PEACE FOR YOUR CHILD.

All of our services including our support groups, online teleseminars /webcasts, divorce management program, counseling services, educational resources and integrated referrals to lawyers with a track record of success and experience working with fathers, we have helped a lot of fathers improve and/or win inside and outside of Family Court.

IT BEGINS WITH A SIMPLE DECISION

It all begins and ends with a simple decision: You must first believe that you can your situation  better. Then with our help and resources coupled with your diligent effort and dedication to the task at hand, your belief that we can help you, plus your commitment to do what is necessary to follow the steps we outline, you can and will realize the same success that all of the other fathers we have helped over the past 15 years.

When you have a problem in life, the best course of action is to find models of success that you can learn from. It is not a time to reinvent the wheel, rather it's time to do what has worked for others...and that is what we offer you - access to this knowledge. It has taken many years of hard work, research and testing to establish create the tools and programs we have developed.

This does not work for everyone...
We cannot help everyone, remember that it all comes down to you! If you are determined to do it your way and not follow our method, if you are not willing to make the effort - we cannot help you - nobody can. You can remain stuck blaming everyone else, but the truth is that the fault lies entirely with yourself.  If you keep doing things that are not working you will fail.

Please join us at a support group meeting and/ or teleseminar on Sunday night to begin learning how you can turn your situation around today.
 

For more information about our Services, Co-Parenting Programs, Divorce Management Programs,
please call 416-861-0626 / 1-888-54-DADDY


We have helped fathers all over the world learn the skills necessary turn their situation around and succeed. If we unable to offer you a direct referral to a lawyer where you live, we will teach you the questions and tips you will need to help you find the right lawyer.  Lastly, our number one goal is to teach you how to navigate your situation to improvement and how to create a child focused plan of action and parenting plan.

Remember, the most important job
you will ever have...
is to be a dad.
Divorced Dad ToolBox
Learn the winning strategies and tactics designed to help eliminate unnecessary legal fees in Family Court 
 
Download if one of these apply to you:
 
* MASSIVE Legal Bills
* Losing in Family Court
* Lawyer problems
* Parenting time
* Access Problems
* Child Custody
* Paternity Fraud
* Grandparents rights
* Child support too high
* Can’t settle property
* Ex-wife won’t work
* Alimony Problems
* Judges not listening
 
Subscribe to our newsletter
INTERESTED IN FATHERS RIGHTS?
TIRED OF LOSING IN FAMILY COURT?
 
Subcribe to our regular e-mail updates
Just complete the subscription form.
 
Winning = Peace for your kids HERE AND NOW - Not Tomorrow...

Subscribe to our newsletter and learn how to:
* Improve parenting time
* Obtain Shared Parenting
* Win child custody
* Pay correct child support 
* End spousal support 
* Get rid of unfair arrears
* Protect Yourself
* Get your rights enforced
* Keep Drivers Licence
* Be treated with respect
* Maintain your dignity
* Win in Family Court

Learn the secret strategies and winning legal tactics of successful Divorced Dads who win in Family Court every time by applying OUR FORMULA for “WAGING PEACE”  for the sake of your kids.
 
STOP LOSING. BE A WINNER TODAY!
Subscribe to our newsletter "FATHERS RIGHTS NOW" and LEARN HOW.

 

**IMPORTANT NOTICE ABOUT SUPPORT GROUP MEETINGS**
We do not offer legal advice at our support group meetings. Legal advice can only be obtained from a lawyer. We do not have a lawyer in attendance at our support group meetings. Our free support group meetings are chaired by a senior certified law clerk who is also a divorced father and an adult child of divorce. Our Support Group meetings are a place to share and exchange personal experience and knowledge about the process of separation and divorce. Discussions at our meetings are of a supportive nature so that fathers can gain a clearer understanding of separation/divorce from the perspective of fathers who have had success in Family Court. Meeting dates are subject to change.
**IMPORTANT NOTICE ABOUT SUPPORT GROUP MEETINGS**
We do not offer legal advice at our support group meetings. Legal advice can only be obtained from a lawyer. We do not have a lawyer in attendance at our support group meetings. Our free support group meetings are chaired by a senior certified law clerk who is also a divorced father and an adult child of divorce. Our Support Group meetings are a place to share and exchange personal experience and knowledge about the process of separation and divorce. Discussions at our meetings are of a supportive nature so that fathers can gain a clearer understanding of separation/divorce from the perspective of fathers who have had success in Family Court. Meeting dates are subject to change.

DISCLAIMER

All information, documents, links, resources on this website and the information discussed at our Q&A support group meetings DOES NOT CONSTITUTE LEGAL ADVICE.  If you wish legal advice please consult with a lawyer. The information on this website is simply one possible starting point for your 'strategic consideration'.

DISCLAIMER

All information, documents, links, resources on this website and the information discussed at our Q&A support group meetings DOES NOT CONSTITUTE LEGAL ADVICE.  If you wish legal advice please consult with a lawyer. The information on this website is simply one possible starting point for your 'strategic consideration'.
Divorced Dad Daily Articles

The Difference In Reactions Between Men & Women Hitting Their Partners In Public-
One real problem in Domestic Violence is our refusal as a society to recognize that all violence is wrong and should be recognized as such. Hence I believe our curent discussion of domestic Violence is immature at best.
10/9/2014 4:37:29 PM

Super Dad Ad - That's What I Like To See!
Campaign does away with the bumbling dad - Tribal Worldwide Toronto ad has its fans, but not everyone loves #HowToDad.
7/27/2014 6:40:48 AM

Larry King: “You Don’t Divorce Your Children”
Larry King Talks about Divorce and the impact on kids.
7/22/2014 12:11:45 PM

Judge casts feuding Hamilton couple in ‘Breaking Bad Parents’
It's about time Judge's told it like it really is, and held parents to account. If only more Judges would let it be known that they ae looking for the mature parent...Great story here...we need to see more Judges do things like this that instruct parents that their lawyers encouraging them to fight is not the way to go.
7/17/2014 9:21:08 AM

The ANSWER for Divorced Dads looking to WIN in Family Court
There is no reason to be losing so badly when you are a divorced dad in Family Court... except that you don't have the right ideas, tools nor skills. BUT....IF… you can listen, follow a plan and are “coach-able”, we can DEFINITELY help you to improve the situation thi Sunday January 13th, 2008 on our teleseminar / webcast at DivorcedDadWeekly.com
1/11/2008 3:36:48 AM

Summary - “Divorce 101 - Step Four - Negotiation: Positioning For Peace”
Waging Peace is the # 1 Negotiation / Positioning tool, strategy, tactic and systematic approach we recommend for creating multiple win/win solutions when you are a divorced dad in Family Court, facing custody, access, child visitation and child support issues. Waging Peace means putting aside blame, anger, recrimination, fault finding, revenge and all other negative emotions and fully considering the implications of every choice you make and how it will affect your child of divorce.
10/22/2007 2:49:08 PM

Divorced Dads - FREE Teleseminar / Webcast Training Call Tonight October 22, 2007 at 7:30 PM EST
"DIVORCED DAD WEEKLY TELESEMINAR / WEBCAST TONIGHT!" Our regular weekly 70 minute teleseminars tonight Monday October 22nd, 2007 at 7:50 PM EST. Please join us on the call before it begins at 7:50 PM EST. TONIGHT'S CALL: Divorce 101 - Step 4: Negotiation: "Positioning for Peace..."
10/22/2007 2:42:29 PM

Divorced Dads - FREE Teleseminar / Webcast Training Call Tonight at 7:30 PM EST
"DIVORCED DAD WEEKLY TELESEMINAR / WEBCAST TONIGHT!" Our regular weekly 70 minute teleseminars tonight Monday October 15th, 2007 at 7:50 PM EST. Please join us on the call before it begins at 7:50 PM EST.
10/15/2007 12:59:42 PM

Divorced dads - FREE Teleseminar / Webcast Training Call Tonight at 7:30 PM EST
"DIVORCED DAD WEEKLY TELESEMINAR / WEBCAST TONIGHT!" Our regular weekly 70 minute teleseminars begin tonight Monday September 24th, 2007 at 7:30 PM EST. Please join us on the call before it begins at 7:50 PM EST.
9/24/2007 3:30:31 PM

FREE teleseminar for Divorced Dads launches Thursday December 21st, 2006
Please join our FREE 70- minute call at 5:30 PST/8:30 EST fo Divorced Dads on Thursday December 21st, 2006.
9/24/2007 1:52:10 PM

Divorced Dad Daily - The FRI Blog

Divorced Dad Daily (DDD) is the the main blog (parent) of FRI. It includes a category (child) entitled Fathers Resources.

9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Press Release Blog
We will be keeping the media and the public up to date on Fathers Resources International by publishing press releases and media reports here on the Press & Media Blog.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

History of Fathers Resources International - Part one
History of Fathers Resources International, its activities and the autobiography of its founder, Danny Guspie. Part one - Prologue: The boy becomes the man: A childhood hero points the way and provides the inspiration.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

'Virtual' Visits the future of Parenting Time
Virtual Parenting Time
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Joint custody could improve state's child support efforts

FOLLOW THE MONEY...

Good article here on child support enforcement being improved by having a joint custody presumption in Michigan:

Note the following - the industrialization of child support as an adjunct to "The Divorce Industry"

One thousand seven hundred employees now work full-time in Friend of the Court offices as referees, counselors, clerks, and support staff in all 83 Michigan counties. In addition, many employees of the criminal justice system devote a major portion of their workday to this last vestige of debtor's prison.

So it is no surprise that there was consternation in Lansing over a federal plan that cut nearly a quarter billion dollars in Michigan subsidies for child-support enforcement. But one state legislator, Rep. Leslie Mortimer, R-Horton, has introduced a bill that could reduce the need for devoting so many resources to child support enforcement.

The problem we see daily is the "Ghost figures" that Ontario uses for its claim that there is 3 Billion dollars in unpaid child support.

Hogwash - 2 Billion of it is nothing but the meter ticking on matters that never return to Court for a termination order because dad can't afford a lawyer to get his Court order changed. Then he faces licence suspensions and possible jail time.

In the Alberta case Henry and Henry which is currently before the Canada's Supreme Court, a dissenting Judge nailed it perfectly - If child support should automatically go up with an increase of income, fairness dictates the reverse should also happen - Child support should go down when income decreases.

But then what would everybody at Child Support Enforcement do for a real job?

9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Divorced Dad brings test case to publicize shared parenting deal
Divorced Dad brings test case to publicize shared parenting deal - Dad wants to set example to other former couples: Injunction bans him from revealing details of his parenting plan.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Repeal the Bradley Amendment - The birth of Debtors Prison for Dads Worldwide
Repeal the Bradley Amendment - Where the Child Support money trail begins in North America and the creation of Debtor Prison for Fathers in The United States...
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

History of Fathers Resources International - Part Two

History of Fathers Resources International - Part Two

By Danny Guspie

PROLOGUE: Part 2 -  The Apple does not fall far from the tree

“The Beatles: An Authorized Biography” by Hunter Davies spoke to me like no other book I’d ever read before. I was a well read kid at that point, having read everything I could get my hands on from the moment I could read which would be somewhere around age four when my mother taught me the alphabet with a set of plastic letters that had magnets and a board to move them around on…

The Book: A wondrous tale happy, sad and true (or at least so I believed at that age…) that I related to. Mainly because of John Lennon’s family history, there was something very familiar and haunting about it, despite many things that were not held in common between our respective families. It was his quintessential Rock n’ Roll vocal – he seemed like the real deal (at a time when my family seemed like a charade…). I could not only hear his pain, but I could feel it – it gave expression to my own.

So began a love affair of a different sort, one of a young boy who’d found a kindred spirit, who wanted to know why he’d been so deeply affected by this story. It was not to be the first or the last time John Lennon would profoundly shape my development and independence in the same way Elvis Presley did for Lennon at age 15…

Arguably, Lennon’s music and the Beatles were the most influential aspect of my young life, helping me to feel hope, happiness and providing a language to articulate express and begin creating my own identity during my family crisis and resulting divorce. I always knew my parents were troubled from age 1 onwards. But at age 9 I became extremely cognizant that the end of my family was nigh.

John gave me an outlet. A very healthy one. He taught me how to transform pain into art. Music has always been my greatest outlet to expression. But John taught me how to scream. Really scream in a Rock n’ Roll way - Once I heard his first solo album when I was 12. I began my own form of primal therapy. When I heard him sing “Mother” I finally felt I wasn’t the only one who felt the same pain over a family that had large problems.

I absorbed Rock n’ Roll totally. It gave me a reason to get up everyday. Even today Little Richard’s “Wop bop a loo bop a wop bam boom…gets me “rockin’” I’m sure anyone who hears me play today, and who has heard my songs can easily see that John Lennon and Keith Richards made a huge and everlasting impression on me musically.

So I began playing drums and songwriting, and emulating John. Within 12 months my parents separated and ultimately divorced and I became a latch key kid, living with dad first then Mom, then on my own. So began my lifelong journey with divorce - But before I left home, I became a full fledged drop out. Spare was my favorite class in High School (with “high” being the operative word….)

At age 14 I was playing guitar, hooky on a daily basis, had done an enormous amount of drugs of all sorts and on weekends go to watch the film Rolling Stones “Gimme Shelter” - 35 times to be exact at CineCity. I was also fanatical film watcher at the “Original 99 cent Roxy Theatre” long before the Rocky Horror Picture Show destroyed and closed that theatre down for good. It was a good place to hang and get high with minimal fuss and forget the mess my life was because of my own unhappiness with my family.

Next – Lost and Found

9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Shared parenting Bill in New York State
'Shared parenting' seen as custody solution Bills in New York would require courts to treat mom, dad equally
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Child-support bill tied to revoked drivers' licenses fails in Utah
A child-support bill tied to drivers' licenses fails to pass the Senate in Utah - Associated Press: Utah Senators had concerns about revoking the driving privileges of those not paying child support because they weren't being allowed to see their children.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Children so traumatized by their parents divorce, that they need psychiatric treatment
A record number of Ulster Ireland couples are splitting up - leaving children so traumatized they need psychiatric treatment - it emerged today. A family expert said she feared divorce levels here had reached epidemic proportions.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

MORE than 300,000 divorced dads will pay more relaistic child suport in Australia
Caring for a child for between 52 and 126 nights each year will reduce the amount owed by 24 per cent, while those with custody for more than 176 nights will cut their maintenance bills by half. The new formula also recognises for the first time that the cost of raising children increases as they get older.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

"ISN'T CHILD SUPPORT FOR THE CHILD?" By Danny Guspie
Open letter from Danny Guspie to the Governments of Canada: "ISN'T CHILD SUPPORT FOR THE CHILD?" I was inspired to ask yet again for an accounting of where the increased tax revenue dollars go since the implementation of the Child Support Guidelines in 1997. Heidi and I met with the Department of Finance who could not give us these answers 9 years ago. Hopefully they've had time to do the books ;-)
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Prime Minister Harper - Hockey Dad
The winds of political change for Divorced Dads in Canada begins at a hockey rinck on Otta...
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Adultery = No Spousal Support in South Carolina
No spousal support for adultery in South Carolina
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

The REAL problem with unilateral no-fault divorce
"The problem with unilateral no-fault divorce is that it hurts women by removing the incentive for the moneyed spouse (who is usually the husband) to make a settlement,"
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Love's grand - Divorce is a Hundred Grand ;-)
Yes, say two University of Virginia sociologists who found that married women are happiest with a sensitive guy who earns most of the family's money. Women are also willing to take on more housework if they feel their husbands pay attention to them, and they feel the arrangement is "fair," if not equal.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Divorced Dad and Actor Alec Baldwin writes book on Family Court

Actor Alec Baldwin is writing a book about child custody cases after enduring a heartbreaking custody battle for his daughter, Ireland. "The book is not necessarily a memoir about my own situation, because no matter what you do, no matter how difficult this process is, you've got to keep in mind the other party is still the co-parent of your child, so you've got to be careful there."

The day is soon coming where we will hit critical mass - Change will come about because even the famous, rich and powerful who have been burned so badly in Family Court will make it their life's work to make change possible.

I really like that he says: "...you've got to keep in mind the other party is still the co-parent of your child."

9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Divorced Dad in South Dakota takes MASSIVE ACTION
NORTH DAKOTA: Secretary of state OKs child custody initiative by Divorced Dad - He has until August to get nearly 13,000 signatures to get it on the ballot for a state-wide vote.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM

Divorced Dads Unite: "ISN'T CHILD SUPPORT FOR THE CHILD?" - Part two
TAKE ACTION - Children of Divorce should not be paying down the national debt.
9/24/2007 12:10:16 AM
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